my intention in yoga today was creativity.
i told myself that this summer i would do yoga, spend
lots of time outdoors with my kids, and write (a lot, about anything,
just as long as i am putting words down.) i have done yoga 3-4 times a
week and taken the kids out every afternoon. i have only attempted one
piece of writing--about our first year of public school--and it was a
train wreck so i hucked it.
my creativity has stage
fright. ever since i committed to going back to school to study creative
writing, i've felt zero inspiration and an impending sense of dread
about writing. so much self-doubt has oozed its way into my brain. even
my tiny, uncapitalized letters here reflect my feeling of weakness on
the page.
instead of attacking my writing in my usual way, which
requires me having a topic and the drive to sculpt it into a readable
piece, i am trying to get creative about my writing. sneak around in
more subtle ways. no big movement or loud noises.
examples:
having a separate private journal-blog to jot down any ideas, thoughts,
experiences without the pressure of having to form it into something
coherent. being okay with not posting anything epically wonderful to my
main blog. thinking about poems in my head, but not necessarily writing
them down. making up stories for the children in the car and then
visualizing them as picture books. combing through books at thrift
stores and adding selections to my nightstand that extend past my usual
variety, and not promising to read them. opening up my laptop less
often.
taking a cue from yoga, i am trying to be very gentle and
patient with myself. to have faith that i'll get somewhere--here,
there, nowhere in particular--as long as i pay attention to my
creativity.
so i'd like to know: how do you stay creative?
creativity is a by product of my emotional state. the more challenging life is, the more intense my emotions are, the words seem to flow from my brain and fingertips. some will be good. some will be crap. sometimes you cook a winner of meal, sometimes you don't, yet you still try to cook & eat everyday. it can be the same.
ReplyDeleteI would really suggest free writes (ala Natalie Goldberg) or morning pages (ala Julia Cameron) - I find that I come up with unexpected things that way, and it helps me be more creative and specific with intentional writing. Something about putting pen to paper and not allowing yourself to stop moving the pen forces the juices out :)
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